Oguzz07/confession_new3 · Datasets at Hugging Face

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I slapped someone across the face and blamed it on a tic...	I knew someone in high school who had Tourette's and I also suspected he faked some of his tics to do some fucked up shit without repercussions.
When I was 12, I blamed my mom’s broken laptop on my 2 year old brother.	Fuck You ~Yanick
I stabbed my classmate in 4th grade but got away with it because she lied when was asked about it	She’s a champ for not telling on you, she knew what she did was wrong, so i would say she also felt bad. I find it weird you can’t apoligise now? It’s clearly a long time ago, but for your sake, you should get closure
I pretend to be interested in middle aged women during interviews and on the job	My boyfriend is quite handsome and very sweet, and the way older women treated him while he was working in an office was nothing short of creepy on many occasions. A lot of the comments they made would have never been tolerated had they been made by a male (to a female), but since it was a bunch of 35-60 year old women making sexual innuendos to a 21-yr old boy it was all considered good fun. I say good on you for working it to your advantage in a harmless way.
I shoplifted at the grocery store out of sheer hunger and desperation.	This is the modern plot of Les Mis. I pray your story ends well. And without your own Javert.
I installed teamviewer on our class’ computer and played porn videos when my classmates were in the middle of their presentation	That’s sexists, girls watch porn... I think.
I was the school phantom shitter	Someone did this In a kids backpack at my school
Jumped the queue, mistaken for a disabled child.	This made my morning hahah! Your dad is the best. Teaching you how to run a scam and lie at 10? He was ahead of the curb 😂
I volunteered to do my aunt/uncles laundry to take money out of their pockets	In my house, that’s the rule. If you do the laundry, you get to keep the money in the dryer. Like a little incentive to do the laundry.
I stole a pregnancy test bc I couldn’t afford one today.	For next time- The dollar store tests have always worked for me. They were more accurate than the supermarket ones.
I got mad that i was falsely accused of talking in 4th grade so i put a pushpin on the timeout chair...	" i hear a “AHHHUUGGGH” coming from my classroom. Almost sounded like Arnold Shwartzeneggar moaning."
I staged a robbery to steal from the store where I work	How much, just curious?
Illegally served beer	I really hope you don’t lose any sleep over this lmao. I did this every night in HS when I worked at an Outback. I’m surprised someone actually cared enough to complain.
I've been stuffing dryer lint in my friends socks for years	I wonder if he ever stops to question why a single sock from every load of laundry he does ends up with a full load's worth of lint in it.
I stole my friends gengar in pokemon the day before he moved.	Team Rocket’s blasting off agaaaaaiiiiinnnnn!
I pooed on the floor at McDonald's bathroom then left it.	Sounds like you ordered a #2.
I put bleach in the laundry during basic training and gave my platoon tie-dye T-shirts	Honestly probably is better that you didn’t say anything it could’ve made your Basic training a whole of lot worse if they started targeting you for the mistake.
I stole from the school store when I was in 4th grade	Chaotic Petty. I would do the same damn thing
i’ve spent close to $2000 dollars of my parents money on league	Holy fuck. You must have literally every champ and skin in the game.
When I was in highschool I catfished a guy I hated and found out he was into furry/bestiality porn	So I have a friend who went to high school in a tiny town in the Midwest. There was a guy at his school that everyone refers to as “goat boy” because his sister walked into their barn one night to discover him screwing a goat. A GOAT. And worse? The goats legs were in the guys boots so it couldn’t get away which probably means it wasn’t the first time. So gross. So cringey. Apparently no one liked him and even some of the teachers called him goat boy.
It wasn't my brothers who googled the boobies, 't was me	Reminds me of when I tried to look up "fagina" in my elementary school dictionary. I didn't find it!
I haven’t went to any of my college classes or done any of the work for them since the start of the semester but I’ve been telling my parents I have.	Most colleges have mental health services. Talk to them. After that, talk to your parents. It's worse to avoid it. You can turn it around more easily than you think, but it is hard to see that sometimes. Good luck.
I convinced a kid to pull the fire alarm and got him suspended.	My sister was in elementary school and jokingly put her hand in the fire alarm and pretended like she was going to pull it, and the person in line next to her freaked and tried to smack her arm away, but only smacked it downand activated the fire alarm.
In 4th grade, I told my friend about my mom’s affair and then accused her of lying and making it up	I’m sorry but fuck your mom for putting you in that situation by asking if it was you. She knew she was caught, what difference would it have made if her own child was the one telling people?
My drug use finally caused me to lose my friends, my family, and, most likely, my job. And I deserve it all.	Interesting read. I understand the thoughts of suicide and your depression/anxiety, but as a sufferer of the same things I can tell you that despite what you've lost due to your drug abuse, nothing is stopping you from taking the steps to bounce back. Seek therapy and/or rehab, a new job, getting back on your feet and the right people will find their way back into your life. That would be one hell of a success story if you ask me. :)
I accidentally had a sexting relationship with my brother on here.... then kept doing it even after I found out.	Now that's the kind of fucked up shit I came here for
I have, for the past 2.5 years, been hiding printed photographs of Academy Award winning actor Nicholas Cage throughout my office.	Nintendo is objectively gay
I stole a final exam in 10th grade and sent pictures of it to everyone who took the class. Another kid had the same idea. He got caught and expelled, and I got away with it.	I stole an eyeliner from the drugstore in 10th grade. Another girl had the same idea. She got caught and arrested, and I got away with it.
When i was 15 i pushed my father down the stairs while in a fight	Did you ever talk to him about it?
I was dishonest to my client and made them pay me for what I could have prevented.	Every print place I’ve ever used said they take no responsibility for the content of the printwork. They print whatever is on the file. I wouldn’t feel too bad because you can know that the client would’ve had the same trouble elsewhere.
I used to bully kids for being gay in high school, while I was secretly having gay sex and was HIV positive. I lied and said I had tried heroin to cover up the fact that I got HIV from gay sex.	My boyfriend in high school had a bully. He was bullied for being a femme gay guy. When we went to college, we spotted his bully in a gay club. We picked him up and fucked the hell out of him... It's been 20+ years, but it made me realize something about the bullies who hated gay kids...
I steal a lot of stuff.	Dude i was the same way, it was a lot of fun, i was very skilled at it. But all it takes is some bored ass security guard to sit behind the cameras profiling people and watching their every move. I got caught this way, the dude literally said he just picks younger people and watches them the whole time they are there and he regularly catches people. It went on my permanent record and it took me thousands and thousands of dollars and many court appearances and a ton of hours of community service to get my recorded cleared. Seriously, i really recommend trying to stop, I you’ll get caught eventually and you’ll pay for all that stuff in the end. It really was not fun.
When I was a young child I helped my Mom hide her cheating from my Dad and I've lived with the guilt ever since I realized what I did.	TBH, I think the dad knew after your brother told him about these encounters. There is really no reason for a kid to make stuff like that up. If I was the dad in this situation, I’d simply won’t push and interrogate the kids. Probably your parents talked and just moved on. Affairs happen. Not every affair ends in divorce.
I pretended my dad had a heart attack to get out of a work contract early and still get my bonus for completing it.	Meh I wouldn’t beat yourself up over it to be honest.
When I was 14 in high school I stole this girls diary and read stuff she wrote about me.	I think you learned a really valuable lesson here that you’re clearly still carrying with you today. Good for you.
I shoplifted and got caught, and I had to pay a fine	I’m laughing omg this was the pettiest of crimes and everyone’s so mad, meanwhile I once saw someone post on here that they once attempted murder and folks were all “glad you learned your lesson, everyone makes mistakes”
I hate it that I'm the one who's always asking about people and making conversation but nobody ever cares to ask me about my life	This happens to me, too. I don't know if it's just in my head or I'm just an idiot or what.
I faked having my right hand burned in middle school so I wouldn't be made to write in class nor do any homework FOR A MONTH	I have always been naturally super pale. In elementary school, any time I felt like going home, I would just say I'm sick and they would always say "you do look really pale" it worked every time
I am an A-List celebrity who hates it. The only reason I haven't killed myself is my kids.	Retire and nobody is going to care about you in a couple of years. Delete all your social media and move to some remote location. If you are as famous as you say, you should have the money to support your family for the rest of their life's.
I have a great job, my mom adores me for all the help I give her, I crochet scarfs for the homeless. No one knows that I am an over the counter drug addict. Not even my therapist.	The dangerous thing about a dependency on most over the counter sleeping pills is that you may eventually not be able to sleep without them. Additionally, please make sure you aren't taking the kind with acetaminophen or ibuprofen, because you could be damaging your liver and kidneys that way. I know you don't want to stop, so at this point, you should look into risk-minimizing so that you don't permanently harm yourself. Even if you don't love life and don't particularly want to continue with it, I'm going to be honest with you and tell you that it sounds like your mom and brother legitimately need you, and if you love them as much as you say you do, you'll keep on keeping on until you start seeing in yourself what they see in you.
I bullied someone who was just asking if i was okay	As someone who was bullied, trust me, it will mean the world to him if you apologised and admitted it was you who was a dick.
I often used to go to the lost and found and stole cloths because I was poor.	I work at a school and 90% of items in lost and found are never picked up. We donate everything that is left at the end of each school year. I wouldn’t feel bad. You did what you needed to do to survive.
Reddit thanked me for not using AdBlock. I forgot AdBlock was a thing, and promptly installed AdBlock. Thanks Reddit.	If you haven't looked into "Ublock Origin" - I would highly recommend that as an alternative.
Only my doctor knows I was a heroin addict for 3 years.	Thank you for all your comments. I have been sitting here for a bit reading everyone of them. Crying and feeling very grateful that you all took the time to say something. I really appreciate it. Thank you!
I was involved in a drug scheme at my high school and let my best friend take the blow.	Don't worry, Issac learned what it really means to have "friends" after this incident I guarantee you
I was a janitor and lived rent-free in the janitors closet.	Every 80's movie ever
I stole my dead sister’s money from a drawer in my dad’s room.	She would have wanted you to have it
I stole from my therapist	She knows
I am 24 hours clean off heroin, but a couple weeks ago I picked up a 2 year chip in AA	Tomorrow's probably gonna suck but please stick with it. You've done it before so you can do it again!!!
I set my alarm at 2 AM just so I can fall asleep again feeling that it's not yet time to wake up	Once I'm up, I'm up. This would backfire horribly.
I had sex with a famous musician when I was 16 and I hate myself for it	It's not sex. It's rape. Sexual assault. They took advantage of a teenager. It wasn't your fault, you were young and scared. Stay strong, that experience does not define who you are. You're so much more than that. You are strong for surviving, and for letting it out. It takes so much to tell your story, the memories is traumatic. But you're stronger than you think.
I used to steal food from the school cafeteria because I didn’t have food at home	There are lots of stories like yours. Morally you feel like you’ve done something bad but a lot of the people who work in those cafeterias look the other way on purpose
I laughed when a salesperson told me his son is severely disabled.	Shit happens. You didn’t mean it intentionally
I fooled my proffesor that he miscalculated my score by showing him the previous test	In high school I was super nice to my teachers and would always get my work done, especially in my art classes. One time though there was an entire project I didn’t do for my photography class, can’t remember why. But my teacher for some crazy reason not only gave me credit for doing the assignment, she gave me 110%. Extra credit somehow.
I making my daughter move out of the house because she's acting like a prostitute.	It's your house, your rules. I would never repeatedly bring strangers into either of my parents homes like that. She is treating you like a roommate but obviously has no respect for you. I'd be embarrassed if I acted that way in front of anyone let alone my parents. Granted I don't live with them anymore and haven't in almost ten years. Your thoughts are justified. Just because she's your kid doesn't mean she can make her own rules about etiquette in your home. It's her life and she can do what she wants, but this is crossing the line. Kick her ass out.
I refused to pick up a passenger outside of a strip club	Always good to follow your gut.
Sometimes I ask my parents for help with something I don’t actually need help with just so they’ll still feel like I need them.	This is really sweet. You are a good one.
I graduated from college and cheated in (almost) everything	My roommate literally cheated his way through an engineering degree. He wasn’t very bright but was really social and latched onto a kid that wasn’t really social but was really bright. Basically became friends with the guy, brought him around to parties and cheated off all his homework.
I irritated a furry porn site off the internet.	Carefully, he’s a hero
I poop with my blinds wide open so the douchebag lawyer next door can see in. I attempt to make direct eye contact while doing so as it is my way of establishing dominance.	Interesting that it makes you feel dominant. If I were to see someone do that I’d forever see them as a smelly caveperson
I Have a Severe Drug Problem that Nobody Knows About	check in to rehab.. you're not alone
I’ve been tricking my friends into thinking they’re getting high, but I actually give them cannabis with very little THC.	It's a very different high, but it still has effects, it's not only placebo. They probably like the relaxing feeling. https://www.leafly.com/sativa/charlottes-web (check in Effects, "relaxing" is maxed out)
I use to pocket the cash payments for the $5 footlong	I loved working at subway cuz hey, free lunch!
I was a racist for a large portion of my teen life	The fact that you’re able to move on beyond your racist views and take accountability is huge... and rare. Best of luck!
I hacked my bully’s typing account	hacker voice
I used graffiti art to make sure my ex had to think about me every day	this would be a good movie plot honestly.
I cut my insulin cord and could’ve been hospitalized a few times...	Hey! I also have type 1 diabeeetus
I used to scam people, by pretending to raise money for kids in Africa	I gave some shady dude 5€ as he was approaching me with a pen and notepad collecting signatures and cash for poor children.
I took a picture of my dead dad	It's ok. If it gives you closure then by all means, keep it.
I Tried to prove a point and killed a bird	I think a middle schooler would've gone for that fry too.
I corrupted a file meant for my history project so I could get extra time	>My descent into a life of crime begins now I guess.
I stabbed a man, in court said it was an accident, got out of charges it was not an accident.	Don't do it again at least?
[Remorse] I called campus police on a party I wasn't invited to	Don't really sound like friends.
When I was a kid, I "waved" a car to go, and caused an accident	A grown man shouldn't be relying on a kid for driving instruction.
I plagiarized my English paper, passed and now it will haunt me forever.	Just imagine he DID know that you copied and he would bring it up out of pettiness just to make you remember it every single time
I stopped dating a guy because of his muslim faith.	Honestly I don’t see any reason to be conflicted here. You can end any relationship you want for whatever reason you want. It sounds like this was far more trouble than it was worth. I don’t see anything to feel guilty over. Even yelling at him. Honestly I think he probably got off light. Find someone who respects you enough not to let his family degrade you right to your face. That’s not okay for an adult to do and I don’t care who his parents are.
I didn't pay federal income tax from 2003 to 2012	Irs enters chat
i faked getting emancipated to get a piercing	That’s a lot of work for a piercing and a tattoo
I blocked a road by my house and made traffic divert for fun	This reminds me of when I was like 25 and living in San Francisco. Late one night, I was sitting on the sidewalk leaning against my garage door smoking a cigarette, and saw a small group of college aged kids walking in my direction, almost definitely coming home from one of the many bars. There was an intersection nearby, and off to the side there was a stacked pile of big traffic cones. I watched them quickly, almost telepathically, make a plan and disperse to put the cones across each side of the intersection. They moved fast and immediately kept walking up the street opposite me, and the moment they saw me they all jumped and froze, obviously not knowing anyone was watching them. I was just amused by their benign mischief, (the neighborhood was a grid with short blocks so the worst it would do was a small inconvenience), so I just raised my arm, gave them a thumbs-up, and they continued scuttering away.
I accidentally sent a photo of my penis when applying for a job	On the bright side this is a wake call that you need to work on your organizational skills if you're keeping your dick and your resume in the same folder
I wiped my butt on a towel while looking at someone’s home	I read the title and thought you wiped with a towel while piercingly gazing out the window at a neighbors house across the street or something
I accepted counterfeit money at work and lied about it	I paid for Chinese delivery with cash a few months ago. The driver came back a couple hours later and told me I'd given him a fake $10 bill. I swapped him for two fives. I still have the $10 bill. It turns out the bill is from 1950 and the pens don't work on bills older than about 1960 because of some change they made in the paper..
My son was in a car accident and it was my fault. [Remorse]	Forgive yourself. You know for a fact that if you'd known, you wouldn't have. Let go of the nonsensical idea that you are somehow so much better than anyone else and should have magically known what you obviously didn't know.
I shout out my window at 3am to mess with my neighbourhood	Everyone knows it you, they just think you're retarded
I've anonymously reported my best friends girlfriend to social services	You did the right thing
I use to bully a kid in middle school.	It’s understandable you’re mad at yourself for this, but you know what to do. Make it right, what are you waiting for? Be honest, ask if you can make it right, and live with his answer no matter what it is. But make it right and you’ll feel better, don’t delay and do it!
I've kept a secret from my parents for the past 23 months, and I'm going to tell them tomorrow.	This is a coming-out-of-the-closet level situation. Let me paraphrase columnist Dan Savage's advice.
I used a CEO’s company discount code to buy clothes at 80% off the retail price.	I would not feel guilty about this
In 5th grade I deleted all of my class' saved work	I got accused of this in 6th grade. It was actually another kid that did it, and he confessed to me after I'd already gotten in trouble for it. The director of the department reamed me out in front of the class, red-faced and screaming, and I was so intimidated that I didn't try to object. They assumed that it was me just because they knew that I was good with computers... That was literally all they had to go on.
When I was about 12 my friend and I got into fight and I stomped on his head.	I think almost everyone has one of those moments where you go from being care free to ‘shit that was fucking dangerous and I could have killed or seriously injured myself / my friend’ etc.
[Conflicted] I am sex worker and I have alot to confess	Did you realise there would be so much complication in your relationships and personal life when you started this work?
I sold six boxes of candy for a fundraiser in eighth grade, and I kept all of the money	In high school for a band fund raiser we were selling these discount cards. We were each given five to start with. I sold them all and kept the money ($50) on accident. By the time I realized I still had the money in my backpack it was the summer and school was out. I felt super guilty for years. Then recently I realized my mom was the treasurer of the band booster and she must have thought I didn’t sell any and probably paid the $50.
Breaks my heart watching my husband trying to lose weight	I just wanted to say, I feel the love that you have for your husband and I think this was so sweetly written.
I use to steal gift cards from shops and actually think they had money on	I mean tbh that’s probably about as harmless of a thing to steal as it gets
Logged into my xhusband's router and blocked all his devices so he couldn't watch porn. Everyday the cable guy drove up, I unblocked it until he left...then blocked it again.	No, he never found out. And why?? Because he was a ASSHOLE!! And he was addicted to porn. After we separated I moved into property we owned across the street. So everyday I would see the cable truck pull up at his house ...I would log on and unblock. I swear one week they came out 4 times. He was very abusive so I could not find a way to fight back ....until then
I puked all over a bathroom stall and left it locked from the inside	One morning, heavily pregnant, I pulled over frantically in a high school parking lot and projectile vomited lucky charms like a demon in front of multiple horrified teenagers. So I too have late night vomit memory anxiety. It will be okay.
My hotel's water wasn't working, and the toilet wouldn't flush; so I pooped into a bag and threw it out of the window.	It had to be done.
I’m a successful person who cannot function without drugs anymore.	Hey if youre in benzos withdrawal its time to see a physician! They'll help you through it safely. If you can afford coke you can afford the doctors so none of that I'm american our healthcare system is lower than dogshit excuse. As for your general dependancy maybe try smoking weed or something less intense (NOT alcohol) until you're out of the worst of it to take the painful edges off.
I charge you for an extra item if you’re an asshole.	This reminds me of a story my mom did for the city paper (she was a photographer) that had a wealthy private university in it. All of the kids at the end of the year would leave year-old TVs, couches, stereos, you name it; because mommy and daddy would buy them all new things for the following school year. They would just stick them out by the dumpster or on the side of the street. Then everyone else just goes to town!
[NSFW] I just want to say it somewhere	Unexpectedly wholesome

I slapped someone across the face and blamed it on a tic...

I knew someone in high school who had Tourette's and I also suspected he faked some of his tics to do some fucked up shit without repercussions.

When I was 12, I blamed my mom’s broken laptop on my 2 year old brother.

Fuck You ~Yanick

I stabbed my classmate in 4th grade but got away with it because she lied when was asked about it

She’s a champ for not telling on you, she knew what she did was wrong, so i would say she also felt bad. I find it weird you can’t apoligise now? It’s clearly a long time ago, but for your sake, you should get closure

I pretend to be interested in middle aged women during interviews and on the job

My boyfriend is quite handsome and very sweet, and the way older women treated him while he was working in an office was nothing short of creepy on many occasions. A lot of the comments they made would have never been tolerated had they been made by a male (to a female), but since it was a bunch of 35-60 year old women making sexual innuendos to a 21-yr old boy it was all considered good fun. I say good on you for working it to your advantage in a harmless way.

I shoplifted at the grocery store out of sheer hunger and desperation.

This is the modern plot of Les Mis. I pray your story ends well. And without your own Javert.

I installed teamviewer on our class’ computer and played porn videos when my classmates were in the middle of their presentation

That’s sexists, girls watch porn... I think.

I was the school phantom shitter

Someone did this In a kids backpack at my school

Jumped the queue, mistaken for a disabled child.

This made my morning hahah! Your dad is the best. Teaching you how to run a scam and lie at 10? He was ahead of the curb 😂

I volunteered to do my aunt/uncles laundry to take money out of their pockets

In my house, that’s the rule. If you do the laundry, you get to keep the money in the dryer. Like a little incentive to do the laundry.

I stole a pregnancy test bc I couldn’t afford one today.

For next time- The dollar store tests have always worked for me. They were more accurate than the supermarket ones.

I got mad that i was falsely accused of talking in 4th grade so i put a pushpin on the timeout chair...

" i hear a “AHHHUUGGGH” coming from my classroom. Almost sounded like Arnold Shwartzeneggar moaning."

I staged a robbery to steal from the store where I work

How much, just curious?

Illegally served beer

I really hope you don’t lose any sleep over this lmao. I did this every night in HS when I worked at an Outback. I’m surprised someone actually cared enough to complain.

I've been stuffing dryer lint in my friends socks for years

I wonder if he ever stops to question why a single sock from every load of laundry he does ends up with a full load's worth of lint in it.

I stole my friends gengar in pokemon the day before he moved.

Team Rocket’s blasting off agaaaaaiiiiinnnnn!

I pooed on the floor at McDonald's bathroom then left it.

Sounds like you ordered a #2.

I put bleach in the laundry during basic training and gave my platoon tie-dye T-shirts

Honestly probably is better that you didn’t say anything it could’ve made your Basic training a whole of lot worse if they started targeting you for the mistake.

I stole from the school store when I was in 4th grade

Chaotic Petty. I would do the same damn thing

i’ve spent close to $2000 dollars of my parents money on league

Holy fuck. You must have literally every champ and skin in the game.

When I was in highschool I catfished a guy I hated and found out he was into furry/bestiality porn

So I have a friend who went to high school in a tiny town in the Midwest. There was a guy at his school that everyone refers to as “goat boy” because his sister walked into their barn one night to discover him screwing a goat. A GOAT. And worse? The goats legs were in the guys boots so it couldn’t get away which probably means it wasn’t the first time. So gross. So cringey. Apparently no one liked him and even some of the teachers called him goat boy.

It wasn't my brothers who googled the boobies, 't was me

Reminds me of when I tried to look up "fagina" in my elementary school dictionary. I didn't find it!

I haven’t went to any of my college classes or done any of the work for them since the start of the semester but I’ve been telling my parents I have.

Most colleges have mental health services. Talk to them. After that, talk to your parents. It's worse to avoid it. You can turn it around more easily than you think, but it is hard to see that sometimes. Good luck.

I convinced a kid to pull the fire alarm and got him suspended.

My sister was in elementary school and jokingly put her hand in the fire alarm and pretended like she was going to pull it, and the person in line next to her freaked and tried to smack her arm away, but only smacked it downand activated the fire alarm.

In 4th grade, I told my friend about my mom’s affair and then accused her of lying and making it up

I’m sorry but fuck your mom for putting you in that situation by asking if it was you. She knew she was caught, what difference would it have made if her own child was the one telling people?

My drug use finally caused me to lose my friends, my family, and, most likely, my job. And I deserve it all.

Interesting read. I understand the thoughts of suicide and your depression/anxiety, but as a sufferer of the same things I can tell you that despite what you've lost due to your drug abuse, nothing is stopping you from taking the steps to bounce back. Seek therapy and/or rehab, a new job, getting back on your feet and the right people will find their way back into your life. That would be one hell of a success story if you ask me. :)

I accidentally had a sexting relationship with my brother on here.... then kept doing it even after I found out.

Now that's the kind of fucked up shit I came here for

I have, for the past 2.5 years, been hiding printed photographs of Academy Award winning actor Nicholas Cage throughout my office.

Nintendo is objectively gay

I stole a final exam in 10th grade and sent pictures of it to everyone who took the class. Another kid had the same idea. He got caught and expelled, and I got away with it.

I stole an eyeliner from the drugstore in 10th grade. Another girl had the same idea. She got caught and arrested, and I got away with it.

When i was 15 i pushed my father down the stairs while in a fight

Did you ever talk to him about it?

I was dishonest to my client and made them pay me for what I could have prevented.

Every print place I’ve ever used said they take no responsibility for the content of the printwork. They print whatever is on the file. I wouldn’t feel too bad because you can know that the client would’ve had the same trouble elsewhere.

I used to bully kids for being gay in high school, while I was secretly having gay sex and was HIV positive. I lied and said I had tried heroin to cover up the fact that I got HIV from gay sex.

My boyfriend in high school had a bully. He was bullied for being a femme gay guy. When we went to college, we spotted his bully in a gay club. We picked him up and fucked the hell out of him... It's been 20+ years, but it made me realize something about the bullies who hated gay kids...

I steal a lot of stuff.

Dude i was the same way, it was a lot of fun, i was very skilled at it. But all it takes is some bored ass security guard to sit behind the cameras profiling people and watching their every move. I got caught this way, the dude literally said he just picks younger people and watches them the whole time they are there and he regularly catches people. It went on my permanent record and it took me thousands and thousands of dollars and many court appearances and a ton of hours of community service to get my recorded cleared. Seriously, i really recommend trying to stop, I you’ll get caught eventually and you’ll pay for all that stuff in the end. It really was not fun.

When I was a young child I helped my Mom hide her cheating from my Dad and I've lived with the guilt ever since I realized what I did.

TBH, I think the dad knew after your brother told him about these encounters. There is really no reason for a kid to make stuff like that up. If I was the dad in this situation, I’d simply won’t push and interrogate the kids. Probably your parents talked and just moved on. Affairs happen. Not every affair ends in divorce.

I pretended my dad had a heart attack to get out of a work contract early and still get my bonus for completing it.

Meh I wouldn’t beat yourself up over it to be honest.

When I was 14 in high school I stole this girls diary and read stuff she wrote about me.

I think you learned a really valuable lesson here that you’re clearly still carrying with you today. Good for you.

I shoplifted and got caught, and I had to pay a fine

I’m laughing omg this was the pettiest of crimes and everyone’s so mad, meanwhile I once saw someone post on here that they once attempted murder and folks were all “glad you learned your lesson, everyone makes mistakes”

I hate it that I'm the one who's always asking about people and making conversation but nobody ever cares to ask me about my life

This happens to me, too. I don't know if it's just in my head or I'm just an idiot or what.

I faked having my right hand burned in middle school so I wouldn't be made to write in class nor do any homework FOR A MONTH

I have always been naturally super pale. In elementary school, any time I felt like going home, I would just say I'm sick and they would always say "you do look really pale" it worked every time

I am an A-List celebrity who hates it. The only reason I haven't killed myself is my kids.

Retire and nobody is going to care about you in a couple of years. Delete all your social media and move to some remote location. If you are as famous as you say, you should have the money to support your family for the rest of their life's.

I have a great job, my mom adores me for all the help I give her, I crochet scarfs for the homeless. No one knows that I am an over the counter drug addict. Not even my therapist.

The dangerous thing about a dependency on most over the counter sleeping pills is that you may eventually not be able to sleep without them. Additionally, please make sure you aren't taking the kind with acetaminophen or ibuprofen, because you could be damaging your liver and kidneys that way. I know you don't want to stop, so at this point, you should look into risk-minimizing so that you don't permanently harm yourself. Even if you don't love life and don't particularly want to continue with it, I'm going to be honest with you and tell you that it sounds like your mom and brother legitimately need you, and if you love them as much as you say you do, you'll keep on keeping on until you start seeing in yourself what they see in you.

I bullied someone who was just asking if i was okay

As someone who was bullied, trust me, it will mean the world to him if you apologised and admitted it was you who was a dick.

I often used to go to the lost and found and stole cloths because I was poor.

I work at a school and 90% of items in lost and found are never picked up. We donate everything that is left at the end of each school year. I wouldn’t feel bad. You did what you needed to do to survive.

Reddit thanked me for not using AdBlock. I forgot AdBlock was a thing, and promptly installed AdBlock. Thanks Reddit.

If you haven't looked into "Ublock Origin" - I would highly recommend that as an alternative.

Only my doctor knows I was a heroin addict for 3 years.

Thank you for all your comments. I have been sitting here for a bit reading everyone of them. Crying and feeling very grateful that you all took the time to say something. I really appreciate it. Thank you!

I was involved in a drug scheme at my high school and let my best friend take the blow.

Don't worry, Issac learned what it really means to have "friends" after this incident I guarantee you

I was a janitor and lived rent-free in the janitors closet.

Every 80's movie ever

I stole my dead sister’s money from a drawer in my dad’s room.

She would have wanted you to have it

I stole from my therapist

She knows

I am 24 hours clean off heroin, but a couple weeks ago I picked up a 2 year chip in AA

Tomorrow's probably gonna suck but please stick with it. You've done it before so you can do it again!!!

I set my alarm at 2 AM just so I can fall asleep again feeling that it's not yet time to wake up

Once I'm up, I'm up. This would backfire horribly.

I had sex with a famous musician when I was 16 and I hate myself for it

It's not sex. It's rape. Sexual assault. They took advantage of a teenager. It wasn't your fault, you were young and scared. Stay strong, that experience does not define who you are. You're so much more than that. You are strong for surviving, and for letting it out. It takes so much to tell your story, the memories is traumatic. But you're stronger than you think.

I used to steal food from the school cafeteria because I didn’t have food at home

There are lots of stories like yours. Morally you feel like you’ve done something bad but a lot of the people who work in those cafeterias look the other way on purpose

I laughed when a salesperson told me his son is severely disabled.

Shit happens. You didn’t mean it intentionally

I fooled my proffesor that he miscalculated my score by showing him the previous test

In high school I was super nice to my teachers and would always get my work done, especially in my art classes. One time though there was an entire project I didn’t do for my photography class, can’t remember why. But my teacher for some crazy reason not only gave me credit for doing the assignment, she gave me 110%. Extra credit somehow.

I making my daughter move out of the house because she's acting like a prostitute.

It's your house, your rules. I would never repeatedly bring strangers into either of my parents homes like that. She is treating you like a roommate but obviously has no respect for you. I'd be embarrassed if I acted that way in front of anyone let alone my parents. Granted I don't live with them anymore and haven't in almost ten years. Your thoughts are justified. Just because she's your kid doesn't mean she can make her own rules about etiquette in your home. It's her life and she can do what she wants, but this is crossing the line. Kick her ass out.

I refused to pick up a passenger outside of a strip club

Always good to follow your gut.

Sometimes I ask my parents for help with something I don’t actually need help with just so they’ll still feel like I need them.

This is really sweet. You are a good one.

I graduated from college and cheated in (almost) everything

My roommate literally cheated his way through an engineering degree. He wasn’t very bright but was really social and latched onto a kid that wasn’t really social but was really bright. Basically became friends with the guy, brought him around to parties and cheated off all his homework.

I irritated a furry porn site off the internet.

Carefully, he’s a hero

I poop with my blinds wide open so the douchebag lawyer next door can see in. I attempt to make direct eye contact while doing so as it is my way of establishing dominance.

Interesting that it makes you feel dominant. If I were to see someone do that I’d forever see them as a smelly caveperson

I Have a Severe Drug Problem that Nobody Knows About

check in to rehab.. you're not alone

I’ve been tricking my friends into thinking they’re getting high, but I actually give them cannabis with very little THC.

It's a very different high, but it still has effects, it's not only placebo. They probably like the relaxing feeling. https://www.leafly.com/sativa/charlottes-web (check in Effects, "relaxing" is maxed out)

I use to pocket the cash payments for the $5 footlong

I loved working at subway cuz hey, free lunch!

I was a racist for a large portion of my teen life

The fact that you’re able to move on beyond your racist views and take accountability is huge... and rare. Best of luck!

I hacked my bully’s typing account

*hacker voice*

I used graffiti art to make sure my ex had to think about me every day

this would be a good movie plot honestly.

I cut my insulin cord and could’ve been hospitalized a few times...

Hey! I also have type 1 diabeeetus

I used to scam people, by pretending to raise money for kids in Africa

I gave some shady dude 5€ as he was approaching me with a pen and notepad collecting signatures and cash for poor children.

I took a picture of my dead dad

It's ok. If it gives you closure then by all means, keep it.

I Tried to prove a point and killed a bird

I think a middle schooler would've gone for that fry too.

I corrupted a file meant for my history project so I could get extra time

>My descent into a life of crime begins now I guess.

I stabbed a man, in court said it was an accident, got out of charges it was not an accident.

Don't do it again at least?

[Remorse] I called campus police on a party I wasn't invited to

Don't really sound like friends.

When I was a kid, I "waved" a car to go, and caused an accident

A grown man shouldn't be relying on a kid for driving instruction.

I plagiarized my English paper, passed and now it will haunt me forever.

Just imagine he DID know that you copied and he would bring it up out of pettiness just to make you remember it every single time

I stopped dating a guy because of his muslim faith.

Honestly I don’t see any reason to be conflicted here. You can end any relationship you want for whatever reason you want. It sounds like this was far more trouble than it was worth. I don’t see anything to feel guilty over. Even yelling at him. Honestly I think he probably got off light. Find someone who respects you enough not to let his family degrade you right to your face. That’s not okay for an adult to do and I don’t care who his parents are.

I didn't pay federal income tax from 2003 to 2012

Irs enters chat

i faked getting emancipated to get a piercing

That’s a lot of work for a piercing and a tattoo

I blocked a road by my house and made traffic divert for fun

This reminds me of when I was like 25 and living in San Francisco. Late one night, I was sitting on the sidewalk leaning against my garage door smoking a cigarette, and saw a small group of college aged kids walking in my direction, almost definitely coming home from one of the many bars. There was an intersection nearby, and off to the side there was a stacked pile of big traffic cones. I watched them quickly, almost telepathically, make a plan and disperse to put the cones across each side of the intersection. They moved fast and immediately kept walking up the street opposite me, and the moment they saw me they all jumped and froze, obviously not knowing anyone was watching them. I was just amused by their benign mischief, (the neighborhood was a grid with short blocks so the worst it would do was a small inconvenience), so I just raised my arm, gave them a thumbs-up, and they continued scuttering away.

I accidentally sent a photo of my penis when applying for a job

On the bright side this is a wake call that you need to work on your organizational skills if you're keeping your dick and your resume in the same folder

I wiped my butt on a towel while looking at someone’s home

I read the title and thought you wiped with a towel while piercingly gazing out the window at a neighbors house across the street or something

I accepted counterfeit money at work and lied about it

I paid for Chinese delivery with cash a few months ago. The driver came back a couple hours later and told me I'd given him a fake $10 bill. I swapped him for two fives. I still have the $10 bill. It turns out the bill is from 1950 and the pens don't work on bills older than about 1960 because of some change they made in the paper..

My son was in a car accident and it was my fault. [Remorse]

Forgive yourself. You know for a fact that if you'd known, you wouldn't have. Let go of the nonsensical idea that you are somehow so much better than anyone else and should have magically known what you obviously didn't know.

I shout out my window at 3am to mess with my neighbourhood

Everyone knows it you, they just think you're retarded

I've anonymously reported my best friends girlfriend to social services

You did the right thing

I use to bully a kid in middle school.

It’s understandable you’re mad at yourself for this, but you know what to do. Make it right, what are you waiting for? Be honest, ask if you can make it right, and live with his answer no matter what it is. But make it right and you’ll feel better, don’t delay and do it!

I've kept a secret from my parents for the past 23 months, and I'm going to tell them tomorrow.

This is a coming-out-of-the-closet level situation. Let me paraphrase columnist Dan Savage's advice.

I used a CEO’s company discount code to buy clothes at 80% off the retail price.

I would not feel guilty about this

In 5th grade I deleted all of my class' saved work

I got accused of this in 6th grade. It was actually another kid that did it, and he confessed to me after I'd already gotten in trouble for it. The director of the department reamed me out in front of the class, red-faced and screaming, and I was so intimidated that I didn't try to object. They assumed that it was me just because they knew that I was good with computers... That was literally all they had to go on.

When I was about 12 my friend and I got into fight and I stomped on his head.

I think almost everyone has one of those moments where you go from being care free to ‘shit that was fucking dangerous and I could have killed or seriously injured myself / my friend’ etc.

[Conflicted] I am sex worker and I have alot to confess

Did you realise there would be so much complication in your relationships and personal life when you started this work?

I sold six boxes of candy for a fundraiser in eighth grade, and I kept all of the money

In high school for a band fund raiser we were selling these discount cards. We were each given five to start with. I sold them all and kept the money ($50) on accident. By the time I realized I still had the money in my backpack it was the summer and school was out. I felt super guilty for years. Then recently I realized my mom was the treasurer of the band booster and she must have thought I didn’t sell any and probably paid the $50.

Breaks my heart watching my husband trying to lose weight

I just wanted to say, I feel the love that you have for your husband and I think this was so sweetly written.

I use to steal gift cards from shops and actually think they had money on

I mean tbh that’s probably about as harmless of a thing to steal as it gets

Logged into my xhusband's router and blocked all his devices so he couldn't watch porn. Everyday the cable guy drove up, I unblocked it until he left...then blocked it again.

No, he never found out. And why?? Because he was a ASSHOLE!! And he was addicted to porn. After we separated I moved into property we owned across the street. So everyday I would see the cable truck pull up at his house ...I would log on and unblock. I swear one week they came out 4 times. He was very abusive so I could not find a way to fight back ....until then

I puked all over a bathroom stall and left it locked from the inside

One morning, heavily pregnant, I pulled over frantically in a high school parking lot and projectile vomited lucky charms like a demon in front of multiple horrified teenagers. So I too have late night vomit memory anxiety. It will be okay.

My hotel's water wasn't working, and the toilet wouldn't flush; so I pooped into a bag and threw it out of the window.

It had to be done.

I’m a successful person who cannot function without drugs anymore.

Hey if youre in benzos withdrawal its time to see a physician! They'll help you through it safely. If you can afford coke you can afford the doctors so none of that I'm american our healthcare system is lower than dogshit excuse. As for your general dependancy maybe try smoking weed or something less intense (NOT alcohol) until you're out of the worst of it to take the painful edges off.

I charge you for an extra item if you’re an asshole.

This reminds me of a story my mom did for the city paper (she was a photographer) that had a wealthy private university in it. All of the kids at the end of the year would leave year-old TVs, couches, stereos, you name it; because mommy and daddy would buy them all new things for the following school year. They would just stick them out by the dumpster or on the side of the street. Then everyone else just goes to town!

[NSFW] I just want to say it somewhere

Unexpectedly wholesome